Violet Hill
by earth warrior
Summary: "What do I do? Tell me what I have to do to get through this... How do I breathe without suffocating, Mattie?" "You do what you have to. You move on, but you wait." And the song twisted into the sky like a bird with a broken wing. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetaila.**

"_What are you supposed to do when your whole life feels like it's just been burned to the ground?" He asked. _

_The other just sighed and took his hand. "You do what you have to: sweep the ashes into a jar so that you always remember, and rebuild from scratch."_

"Where are you?" He whispered. "Why… why did you leave me?" Blue eyes filled with tears as he knelt by the edge of the lake. Forehead to the grass with the tips of his fingers just barely trailing in the water, the wind blew, fingering his hair gently and tossing it to and fro.

Sobs racked his frame and his shoulders were shaking. His chest felt like there were cords wrapped around it tight- he couldn't breathe. Tears streaked down his cheeks relentlessly. "I- I'm scared! Where are you? What am I supposed to do now?" He said to no one. The wind whipped faster, carrying his words away with it.

"Alfred? What's the matter?" A voice cut through his hysteria. Alfred's head jerked up suddenly. His face broke out into a strained, broken grin. Matthew was next to him, up to his chest in lake water. He was leaning against the edge, smiling back, though tears were dripping down his face as well.

Alfred sat up, peering over the earthen ledge. "Oh Mattie! Mattie…" He didn't even know why, but at the sight of his brother he started crying again. "Mattie Mattie Mattie…" he repeated until it hurt. He felt the cords around his chest tighten and his breath hitched.

Matthew looked up at him worriedly, "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. Why are you crying?" His clothes- a white t-shirt and jeans - were absolutely soaked, but he didn't seem to care.

Alfred shook his head, threading his shaking fingers through his hair. "Mattie, what do you do when someone you love more than anything leaves?"

"Is that all?" He asked, letting his hands make ripples in the lake that shimmered in the sunlight whenever he moved. "Oh Al, he'll come back. You two are family, of course he'll be back, it may just take a little while."

The other just shook his head violently and stared at the grass. "No. No, I don't think so. It's been months since I've seen him, and… and I'm scared. I don't even know what I'm doing anymore, Mattie. I miss him so much…" He blinked and set his gaze on his brother pleadingly. "What do I do?"

Matthew seemed determined to avoid the question entirely. "What are you so scared of?"

"I'm scared for him; scared that something might happen to him. And maybe even a little scared for myself too. I think I'm loosing it I'm so afraid, and going crazy just makes it worse." He fell back in the grass, curling up in a ball on his side, facing away from Matthew. He began humming softly to himself, "_If you love me, won't you let me know?… _I just don't know why he left, without even saying a word. I mean, I know I'm annoying, but did I seriously drive him away? He's family, and I really care about him. I love him, Mattie. Doesn't he know that?"

After a long pause, Matthew's solemn voice reached his ears. "Maybe he just needed to go. Maybe it had nothing to do with you. It was just necessary."

"…So why didn't he say goodbye?"

"Who can tell? Why don't you ask him?"

"Because I can't!" Alfred yelled, punching the grass. "He's gone! And he may never come back!" He sat up again, wiping new tears with the sleeve of his t-shirt. "What do I do? Tell me what I have to do to get through this if I can't bring him back myself! How do I breathe without suffocating, Mattie?"

"You do what you have to. You move on, but you wait." Neither of them said a word for the longest time. It was as if all they could do was stare at each other. Matthew was the one who broke the silence, opening his mouth and releasing a line of that song, "_I took my love down to Violet Hill._" His voice seemed thin and ready to snap, but the melody sounded like it was a part of him.

Alfred joined in, and the song twisted into the sky like a bird with a broken wing.

"_There we sat in the snow. All that time she was silent sill…_"

Matthew trailed off.

"_So_ _if you love me, won't you let me know?_"

Alfred broke off as well, pushing himself up. "I don't know Mattie. I've been standing in the snow too long. I think I've frozen to death." He stepped closer, his toes hanging off the edge.

He leaned forward.

And felt hands grab him sharply from behind, yanking him backwards where he collapsed in a heap into someone who smelled of tea and fresh rain. "What the hell are you doing? You never learnt how to swim and that lake is ten feet deep at its shallowest! You're going to drown if you go in the water, Alfred!"

"Oh." Alfred blinked slowly, glancing at his apparent savior, Arthur, whose arms were still wrapped around his shoulders like a vice. When he looked back out to the lake, Mathew was gone without a trace. He couldn't even gather up enough emotion to be surprised anymore. Without another word, he turned and hugged Arthur tightly. Arthur froze in a second of uncertainly and slight mortification, but eventually sighed and let it be. His own eyes trailed over to the spot where he had seen Alfred just moments before. He had been talking to someone, but there didn't seem to be another soul around anymore. How odd.

"There's no need to worry." He told the teenager now clinging to him. "Matthew will turn up soon. He knows what he's doing, even if we don't. He'll be fine."

Alfred nodded. "Yeah… of course. He's right. We'll stay, and we'll wait."

_All that time she was silent still._

_So if you love me, won't you let me know?_

_If you love me, won't you let me know?_

…

…

**OOOooooooOOOOoooooOoOooO**

**Eh, it's not one of my best works, but whatever. I hope you all enjoyed it though, and I hope it wasn't too OOC. **

**Btw, if anyone cares, the sequel to Shatter that I promiesd (forever ago) is still in the works. It's just taking a _really_ long time.**

**Love,**

**earth warrior**


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